Whenever we attend a wedding ceremony in a church, we hear the deacon reciting a passage from the Apostle Paul's letter to the Ephesians, which states: “Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord, for the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ is the head of the church, and he is the Savior of the body. But as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.” Does this diminish her dignity? 

Father Rony Salem, secretary of the Diocese of Mosul for the Syriac Catholics, explained in a discussion with "Asia Mina" the confusion many people—especially women—have regarding this strong call to submission. 

He continued: “Many people, including believers, have a misunderstanding of the meaning of submission in Christian marriage. Some men believe they have the right to exert their male authority, while some women see submission as a diminishment of their worth and dignity.” 

He clarified that the submission Paul refers to does not in any way belittle or reduce the value or dignity of either party, nor is it surrender at the expense of a person’s dignity and identity. The submission intended here does not mean blind obedience without thought, nor does it mean falling under another’s authority and servitude. 

Salem elaborated on submission in Christian marriage: “It means being with the other, for the other, and united with them, because both parties in marriage—the man and the woman—are equal in human dignity, bound together by mutual love.” 

He continued: “Thus, one who loves with all their heart unites with the other, establishing a strong relationship, becoming a faithful companion in their journey. The woman’s submission to her husband becomes a catalyst for the man’s love for his obedient wife, and this love motivates even more love and submission from the woman, creating peace and understanding within the family.” 

Salem added: “We have the church’s submission to our Lord Jesus Christ as a living example; He is its head, and it is His bride whom He loved and redeemed. In this way, a woman’s submission to her husband should be characterized by the love that binds them, making them united partners, submissive to God’s will. Their marriage grows and flourishes through the freely given divine grace and bears love and righteous children who fill the earth with holiness.” 

He concluded by saying: “Submission in Christian marriage is a sacred sign through which the couple honors God and lives the respect and sanctity of marriage, fully understanding that submission is not a tyrannical or oppressive decision, but a free union and acceptance of the partner’s will with mature and balanced understanding.